How to set healthy boundaries in 2024

Setting healthy boundaries liberates you. When you set boundaries, you’re not bound anymore.

Why is it important to set boundaries? Setting boundaries enable us to live a happy, healthy but most importantly a peaceful life. Boundaries help us determine what is okay and what is not okay in a relationship. What is acceptable but most importantly what is unacceptable. Whether that be with our friends, our close family members, our children, our colleagues, our co-workers or our partners. By setting boundaries, we put people in place in order to protect our sanity and our own well-being.

Those who have healthy boundaries never fall prey to any kind of peer pressure. Those who have strong boundaries always make sure that they never betray their values by falling prey to pressure. Setting boundaries help us with what are the do’s and don’ts of our life. Setting boundaries allow you to let go of what doesn’t serve you. Letting go will empower you by allowing you to not accept what’s unacceptable. This will enlighten your heart and at that point you’ll get to know what doesn’t serve your high purpose must fade away.

Setting boundaries allow you to say “NO”. I know that’s the most difficult thing to do, but it’s so courageous to do. We live in a society, where saying “NO” or disagreeing means disrespect; which is not true. When you say “NO” to people without feeling guilty, that’s your real strength. And that’s only possible when you set boundaries in your relations. It’s difficult to say “NO” to people who’re older than us. But here’s the thing. Saying “NO” doesn’t means disrespect. It means you’re not comfortable in that environment or you’re not okay with the behaviors around you. And that can be said in a very respectful way. 

When you’re saying “NO”, remember; NO is a complete sentence. You don’t have to justify to the world why do you feel discomfort or why you’re not okay with the environment. The moment you decide you’re going to set boundaries; most people will not like you. Setting boundaries can be difficult and people will dislike you. But let me tell you one thing; people who will dislike you for setting boundaries are the ones who will always take advantage of you if you don’t have boundaries. If you’re losing people in your life for setting boundaries, those people were never supposed to be in your life at the very first place.

Here are the three steps by which you can set healthy boundaries in your relations;

Step 1. Be as clear and as straightforward as possible. Do not raise your voice.
Step 2. State your need or request directly in terms of what you’d like, rather than what you don’t want or like.
Step 3. Accept any discomfort that arises as a result, whether it’s guilt, shame, or remorse.

People will treat you the way you’re treating yourself. So, if you’re not treating yourself with love, respect and boundaries, people will never have boundaries with you. People will keep hurting you and they’ll keep taking advantage of you.

Let’s get together to take care of our mental health and set some healthy boundaries. Love yourself enough to set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious and you get to decide how to use them. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you’ll and won’t accept.